Every independent woman has heard someone tell them they are ” Heartless”, “Emotionless” or “You love yourself too much” or “arrogant” & “Adamant” but many fail to understand why.  There are few observations that I came across trying to figure out why many of them commented that way or why one feels that way about independent women. I don’t mean to tell that every person thinks of us that way, thanks to those few who understand what being independent means.

Most Independent women currently belong to an era who fall under the first generation of educated women, few of us are thankful to our parents to have allowed us to study and work, knowing the Indian Customs wherein women Empowerment is still booming. It was not a natural step for us to have come till here, few or most relatives would have commented at one point in our lives ” Why are you studying so much at the end you will get married and work at home; better learn how to do household chores”. And many of them would have got oppositions from their parents because their brothers/Sisters son is waiting for them to get married.

Most of the Independent women chose to be so, chose to go against the odds of life and making themselves as a priority. Today someone walks in tries to know them, comments about their independence and walks away, but has one ever tried to understand why they are that way? life has taught them a lot of lessons which in turn made them realize that to achieve something u have to give up something. They are not heartless, it just takes a little longer to get them out of their shells. They prefer not to get hurt due to attachments because they already know how it can affect them. They commit and once they commit to anything be it work or life or relationship they will make ends meet by sewing the yarn to the warmest sweater you chose to wear.

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I can assure you When you talk to independent women rest assured she is taking her sweet own time to open up to you, not because she doesn’t trust you; but because there were many in her life who have betrayed her. She is strong today and has learned how to stand on her own, she might destress by going for a run, travel alone, trek with friends or play a sport but she knows how to pull up herself. She has seen the worse, which is why she is so stubborn with what she wants. They are the most tender women you can find for they always needed someone to hold them when they are weak. The biggest problem with being super independent and strong women is no one ever bothers to ask if she is okay. No, motivating her to achieve her goals, asking about her daily routine is not what she wants. All that she is looking for is a person she can lean on.

There goes a saying that “Smart and independent women tend to find it difficult finding their mate” and I totally agree with it. The reason is not because we are strong or not because we are capable, there is something that we have experienced and that has put us through the worst. There is something that you don’t know about them, they put up a happy mask. I can give my own example when someone (be it anyone) asks me “how my day was?” I shall make you a descriptive answer making it look like a story telling because I write, I am expressive, I am not being self-centered nor am I being self-Lover, it is just that I am trying to make the conversation healthy and happy being expressive. I have many times come across people telling me “it’s always about you”. But that is not what my life actually looks like, you need to get deep down, have the patience to see the other side of me to know how vulnerable I can be. For instance, some people don’t open up around others, but they have wide ideas which you shall know when you meet them personally, likewise, some of them observe and wait to get your assurance that they can be themselves and you wouldn’t judge them.

Most of the time, women who are independent and who can handle themselves make lots of friends in the journey they chose to accomplish their goals, they are very social they can light up any room with laughter and make it lively. They have learned to take up the leadership and they know what topic to discuss with whom, they are the best conversationist and have the knack of leaving the best impression which is most important. No, they can’t act clingy or act like the girl next door, they are usually misunderstood as not caring as they do not know how to express their feelings. They are one Genuine creature on earth who are trying to live on their own, and if you are getting along with them rest it is because they have let you in their circle, which means a lot to them if not for you.

Every woman makes a choice, Some go with others choice to make someone else happy giving up her freedom and hiding her feelings, some take up the odds of life as a challenge and become the man they wanted to date. Being dependent is not bad, but being independent doesn’t mean they don’t value relationship, all that it takes is an extra effort to know these creatures, to know the story behind their every scar. Try to know her before you conclude, she isn’t given her best. Maybe she is still in the process of analyzing you while you have already Judged her as Egoistic. Don’t lose a Moon, searching for the stars in the sky.

Try to see the other side of a person before making a conclusion, life will always become simpler!