Every minute everyone is trying to take control of something, trying to make the best out of the situation etc. Is it really necessary for us to take control of everything and make a mess out of it when we are not able to manage it well? First of all why do you want to take control? Does it really matter to you so much that you want to take control of a Situation? My point here is what are you trying to prove by doing this?
It so happened that, when I was shopping I met a very old friend of mine and I was astonished to see her after almost 6/7 years. As usual we started with “Long time no see, whats up? ” and it finally went to the main family drama that she wanted to share. She was like “My life is hell, my mother in law is never satisfied with what ever I do, I am glad that you are having fun in your life.” I just sat down and tried to figure out what the problem was and all I could find was, theirs is a love marriage and her husband is her puppet. She is expecting the same from her mother in law as well. The reason I am sharing this here is to just let you know that it is difficult for his mother also to cope with this change. I am happy that he loves you so much, but do understand that she has been seeing him since his birth and she fears to lose him to you. Dear girls, weather it is love marriage or arranged you are getting a package of people to value not just him alone. Never try to take control in someone else’s house making it difficult for others to survive. You expect him to take care of your parents but does that not apply to you as well? I don’t mean that Guys are right either, Guys also need to understand that they need to balance both the families as one.
I have even seen few friends change for the sake of their BF’s / GF’s , is it that you are not happy being what you are ? or The other person is changing you to someone whom they want you to be like? or that you don’t love yourself? What I am trying to say is why are you not the way you are? there will be someone who will accept you for what you are and for they way you are, don’t rush , only when you love yourself you can be happy. Try to do what makes you happy so that you don’t have regrets later. Since I am talking about taking control, let others be as they want, everyone is uniquely blessed. Every one has the capacity to think help them becoming a better person than changing them to what they cannot be, they will end up acting throughout their life and one day blame you for it all.
It doesn’t happen only in relationships, taking control is seen at work place as well. We see this every where yet we try to change someone’s life even if they don’t mean anything to us. That doesn’t mean that I can change someone who matter’s to me , I can just give suggestions to people by telling then what I feel is right or wrong, at the end, it is they who decides what they want to be. I always feel that we need to find something good in a person before pointing out his mistakes, doing this only adds value to a person. By taking control I might actually lose a good person and remake them to someone else.
These are just my thoughts, or just what I believe in. Accept all the way they are, you will find the true meaning of their existence in your life.
C. A. Stubborn Pen 